Deutsch’s Diatribe

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PAUL

Release Date: August 9, 2011

Tag Line: Ever felt a little alien?

Description: Two sci-fi comic geeks embark upon a pilgrimage in a RV to the center of America’s UFO heartland: Nevada’s infamous Area 51. While in the middle of the desert, the two friends encounter a fugitive alien by the name of Paul. Somewhat reluctantly, they embark upon an adventure that will change not just their lives, but also the lives of the friends and enemies they encounter along the way.

Running time: 104 minutes

Rating: R

Plot: What starts out as a simple comedy about a crass, rude alien turns into a debate regarding the Christian faith vs. evolution. Unfortunately, the film beats viewers over the head with evolution and portrays Christians in a far less than positive light. A little sparring over the debate would be fine, but the movie seems intent on shoving evolution down viewers’ throats. More focus on the funny would have been better.

Acting: Simon Pegg and Nick Frost have teamed up before, most notably in Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz.  They’re a natural comedic pair, and they deliver the goods once again. Adding to the supporting cast is Seth Rogen as the voice of Paul (good casting), Jason Bateman, Sigourney Weaver, and Kristen Wiig. Bill Hader and Joe Lo Truglio are notable as a pair of bumbling agents, and Bateman is perhaps my favorite character in the movie. It adds up to a solid all-around cast well armed with a litany of hilarious zingers and one-liners.

Special Effects: The majority of the special effects budget was, of course, spent on the CGI creation of Paul. The effects are top-notch, and Paul blends in seamlessly with the rest of the cast. At no time does look like he’s fake or out of place.

Memorable Dialogue Samples:

“What is this? Nerd porn?”

“Listen, frick and f#$%. I want everything you know about those pissy nerds.”

“This is America! Kidnapping a Christian is worse than harboring a fugitive!”

“Look, just because your truth isn’t the true truth doesn’t mean there is no truth, Ruth.”

Keep an Eye Out For. . .

Wiig’s character’s “Evolve This” T-shirt. Hilarious and so wrong in so many ways.

The framed photo inscribed by President George Bush, Sr. 

The many allusions to other alien movies in popular culture, like Aliens (such as the casting of Weaver), Predator, Star Wars, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, and of course, E.T.

The Bottom Line: As a comedy, the movie is hilarious on a number of different levels, but it goes over the top with the evolution angle. That becomes a distraction and detracts from the overall entertainment value of the film. Other than that, though, the movie is not just funny, but it’s also clever, with plenty of pop culture references, “jokes within jokes,” sight gags, and physical comedy.

Recommendation: If you’re comedy movie fan—and especially a fan of Powell and Frost—you’ll enjoy Paul tremendously. You’ll have to tolerate the seemingly endless “evolution vs. Christianity” debate and the unflattering portrayal of Christians, but if you side with evolution, you’ll probably enjoy that tremendously, too. Whatever the case, Paul is a witty re-telling of the alien story with a decidedly modern twist, one that definitely colors outside the lines . . . and enjoys doing so.

Final Grade: B+

Your Thoughts: If you’ve seen this movie and would like to offer your own opinions, please share by commenting below and/or posting this review to your favorite social media site(s).

HAYWIRE

Release Date: May 1, 2012

Tag Line: They left her no choice.

Description: Mixed martial arts fighter Gina Carano makes her feature-film debut as a lethal government contractor who’s betrayed by her own agency in this action thriller from writer Lem Dobbs (The Limey) and director Steven Soderbergh (Traffic, Contagion). Mallory Kane (Carano) is the woman the U.S. government calls on to take care of their dirty work. She’s fast, efficient, and — perhaps most important of all — clean. But when Mallory makes the mistake of saving a Chinese journalist from certain death, she becomes an enemy to the very same government she once served. Mallory isn’t going down without a fight, though, and after a close brush with death, she realizes that the only way to save her own life is to reveal the government’s deception. Now, as assassins close in from all sides in an ominous attempt to silence her forever, Mallory sets a trap and races to reveal a massive deception that threatens global stability. Michael Douglas, Michael Fassbender, Ewan McGregor, and Bill Paxton co-star. (courtesy of Fandango).

Running time: 93 minutes

Rating: R

Plot: It’s all been done before, but Haywire does it with a fair amount of vigor and relish, helped along by Carano’s passive-aggressive approach (with an emphasis on aggressive).  Unfortunately, the movie suffers from a uneven flashback storytelling method that can become mildly confusing at times.  However, when in doubt, just wait for Carano to kill everybody. No confusion there. In the movie’s defense, it does wrap things up, albeit it in a clumsy fashion, and without the zest and vigor that typified the rest of the film.

Acting: Carano fared well in her debut, although she didn’t really need to show much range.  The supporting cast is top-notch when you have names like Michael Douglas, Ewan McGregor, and Bill Paxton backing you up.

Special Effects/Action Choreography: The fight choreography is crisp, suitably angled and edited well, with broken glass, broken furniture, and broken bones aplenty.  Not too much of a need to blow things up, which is all fine and good. This isn’t that kind of action film.

Memorable Dialogue Samples: 

“I don’t even know how to play that. I don’t wear the dress. Have Paul wear the dress.”

“You can tell me right now why you sold me out and what you’re into with Studer, or you can tell me in 10 minutes, when I have my hands around your throat.”

“You shouldn’t think of her as being a woman. That would be a mistake.”

Keep an Ear Out For. . .

 Carano’s voice.  It was apparently digitally altered in post-production to make it sound deeper.

The 70′s-style music that pops up every once in a while. Fits well into the overall dynamic.

Keep an Eye Out For. . .

Carano putting a pillow over the head of her “husband” and shooting him in the face. The divorce is obviously final.

The Bottom Line: Solid action fare with a genuine woman lead is difficult to find, and Carano delivers on all counts. We’ll be seeing her in more films in the future. In fact, according to IMDB, she’s set to appear in The Fast and the Furious 6, due for a 2013 release. Overall, the film is akin to slurping a series of “five-hour energy drinks” over the course of 93 minutes, with rushes of adrenaline spaced evenly for your action edification. Actually, “Haywire” would be a good name for an energy drink.

Recommendation: Haywire is a good choice for action movie buffs, especially those who can spot a poser when they see one.  This flick is worth the 93 minutes and whatever money you may have to spend in order to watch it. This is one “chick flick” that’s short on soft and fluffy and long on kicks to the head.

Final Grade: B

Your Thoughts: If you’ve seen this movie and would like to offer your own opinions, please share by commenting below and/or posting this review to your favorite social media site(s).

ХудожникikoniOne of the things that I’ll be doing here at the “Diatribe” is writing movie reviews.  For that purpose, I’ve devised the following movie rating system.

I’m not a big fan of the star system (one star, two stars, etc.). I’d rather use the system that Entertainment Weekly uses—namely letter grades. However, they don’t take it as far as I’m going to take it, as you can plainly see below:

A+: Should be watched by everybody, regardless of which genre of movies they normally enjoy.

A: Nearly a perfect movie, but whatever flaw (or flaws) it might have should be overlooked for the greater good.

A-: Exceptionally well done and is still a movie that could be conceivably enjoyed by everyone who watches it.

B+: Fans of the genre should definitely watch it, and those who generally don’t watch movies of this type might like it, too.

B: A solid offering on nearly all levels, but lacks that certain something that would have taken it to the next level.

B-: Has potential, but falls short of that potential for whatever reason. Could still be entertaining, though, so you might not want to pass it up.

C+: Delivers a bit more than your average movie, but ultimately its beauty (or lack thereof) will be in the eye of the beholder.

C: As average as average can be. You can take it . . . or leave it.

C-: Has its fingers hanging on the edge of watch-able, but depending on who you are, it might not fall into that category.

D+: Has the smallest of redeeming qualities . . . but damned if I know exactly what those are.

D: It makes an effort, and quite frankly, that effort sucks quite a bit. However, it could be worse.

D-: Consider this the first circle of movie hell, and you just bought a front row ticket.

F+: Does almost all of the things that good movies don’t do, which is why you might stop watching it halfway through.

F: Flat-lined, all the way. The patient is dead, and your interest in this movie should be, too.

F-: You’ve already wasted too much time on this movie by reading this review. Forget it exists.

Feel free to refer to this rating system when I post movie reviews. I’ll also include a link to this blog post with each review. So sit back, relax, and let’s watch some movies!